


Can't Catch A Break

by canthelpmyselves



Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Powers, Bad Luck, Getting to Know Each Other, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-04
Updated: 2018-09-04
Packaged: 2019-07-07 02:10:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,741
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15898788
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/canthelpmyselves/pseuds/canthelpmyselves
Summary: Len and Barry just want one date, uninterrupted, but Fate doesn't seem to be on their side.





	Can't Catch A Break

The moment the door closed he found himself pressed back against the cold steel. He moaned wantonly as Barry's taut thigh slid between his own and brushed his hard length. Hot lips latched onto the skin that stretched over his clavicle, nipping and sucking hard enough to leave a mark. He grabbed the younger man's hips and pulled him in as close as possible, desperate to feel the slide of skin-tight denim over his worn jeans.

"Dammit, kid," he groaned. "Harder." A sly chuckle reached his ears just before a slick tongue teased his Adam's apple.

"Someone's eager."

Len bit back a growl as his hands slid around to Barry's ass and squeezed tight. He rolled his hips, seeking friction. He lifted the younger man up and took three long steps before turning and falling back onto the couch. Barry sat up on his lap, quickly tugging his shirt off. Len licked his lips as Barry revealed his pale, lean torso. He trailed his fingers down Barry's abs and across his hip bones before reaching up to pinch his rose colored nipples. Barry moaned and arched his back a little before reaching down and making short work of unbuttoning Len's shirt. He felt a moment's wariness about showing his scars until he saw Barry's expression of complete and utter awe.

"Gorgeous," Barry whispered reverently. His fingertips lightly skimmed Len's pecs, down to his navel before going back up to tease his chest hair. "Fuck, Len," he swallowed, "you're so damn sexy."

With a growl Len surged up and kissed Barry, deep and filthy. His fingers threaded through Barry's hair and tugged hard, earning him a greedy sigh. Barry slipped Len's shirt off his shoulders and down to his elbows before wrapping his arms around Len's neck.

"Going to make you feel so fucking good," Len promised huskily. He reached between them to the button on Barry's jeans but the door behind them flew open, shocking both men.

"Well, well, well," a smarmy voice cooed. "Who's the twink?"

Barry blushed pink and scrambled off Len's lap, diving for his shirt. Len shot a fierce glare at Mick and Mark before shrugging his own shirt back on and buttoning it up. "What the hell are you two doing here?"

Mick looked at Len with his typical disgruntled expression. "We're having dinner, remember? Lisa's parking the car."

"Umm, I should go," Barry mumbled, edging toward the door.

Mark looked him up and down with a sneer. "Yes, you should."

Barry turned red as a beet and quickly exited the apartment without a word. Len groaned and ran a hand down his face. "Damn it!"

Lisa stepped into the apartment with an amused smirk in her face. "So, who was the jailbait that just ran by me toward the stairs?"

Len snarled under his breath and began walking down the short hall to his bedroom. He had met the younger man at Saints. He'd stopped in at lunch time for a beer and burger when he spotted the younger man at another table, eating fries and reading a book. Intrigued, Len had walked over and introduced himself. Barry had blushed enticingly and stammered out his own name. It made Len want like he hadn't wanted in years.

He wanted Barry. Wanted to taste him, touch him, pin him down and eat him alive. Even more astonishing, Barry wanted him, too. Len knew he was no slouch when it came to looks, but he was 43, a little bit gray and he had some body issues. He still attracted his fair share of potential partners, but most were more attracted to his wallet or reputation.

Barry, on the other hand, had no clue as to who Len was or how much money he had. He was 24 and absolutely beautiful. He was fucking 'boy band' gorgeous but so damn adorable and entirely clueless to what a bad idea it was for him to be in that bar! Len quickly discovered he was smart, too. He was fresh out of college and had two degrees, although he hadn't asked Barry what his degrees were in. Barry was way out of his league. Yet, when Len drew him over to the pool tables and teasingly leaned in close to 'help' him take a shot, Barry had turned his head and kissed him. Len ran two stop signs getting them back to the apartment.

Only to have Mick and Mardon interrupt! Fuck! He should have taken Barry to the bedroom as soon as they were inside! He slammed his door hard when he realized he hadn't even gotten Barry's phone number.

***

Len was in line at his bank when he heard a familiar voice. He looked around quickly, his pulse speeding up eagerly. A second later he spotted Barry. The younger man was also at the end of a line, three tellers away, talking to a beautiful young woman with black hair and mocha colored skin in front of him. The instantaneous jealousy he felt spurred him into action. He stepped out of his line, pushed through the two lines separating them, and slid right in behind Barry.

"...just don't get why you won't cover for me," the young woman said with obvious frustration. "I'm calling in a favor, Barr. You do this for me and I won't tell Dad what happened to the microwave."

Len watched curiously as Barry crossed his arms and glared at the back of the woman's head. "Then I'm calling in a favor, too, Iris. Don't make me do this and Joe never has to find out what happened to his pocket watch."

The woman, Iris, gasped and spun to punch Barry in the arm before facing forward again. "Prom night!" she hissed.

Barry sucked in a sharp breath. "Spring break!"

The line moved forward and the teller politely asked Iris how she could help her. While Iris was distracted Len leaned in closer. "Hello, Barry," he purred.

Barry gasped and spun toward Len. His jaw dropped and a lovely blush bloomed across his cheeks. Len started to ask for Barry's phone number, intent on correcting that mistake first and foremost, but Barry was faster. He grabbed Len's hand and quickly pulled him out of the line and down the nearby hallway. In just a handful of seconds they were in the men's room, kissing frantically.

Len's once again found himself pressed up against a door. Not that he minded. Especially when he felt Barry's hands smooth down his chest to his hips and around to his ass. His own hands were threaded through the younger man's hair, tilting his head for a better angle. When oxygen became a priority he broke the kiss and gasped loudly.

"Fuck, Barry," he moaned as lips latched onto his neck. "Didn't think I'd see you again."

Barry hummed softly before lifting his head. "Sorry," he mumbled, licking his swollen lips. "I was a bit freaked out when your friends walked in."

Len grabbed his hips and pulled him in closer. "Understandable." He rocked his erection against Barry's. "Not the place for this. Can we meet up later?"

Barry groaned against Len's neck. "Yeah. We should definitely do that. My place?"

Len bucked hard a couple of times before nodding. "Address."

"127 Grant Avenue," Barry groaned. "Apartment 4C on the third floor."

Len tugged Barry's head up for a quick kiss. "6pm."

Barry nodded quickly. "6pm."

They reluctantly parted and adjusted their straining erections before stepping out of the restroom. Barry quickly rejoined the young woman who, thankfully, hadn't noticed his absence while Len got back in line. He glanced at his watch and smiled. Only three hours and eighteen minutes before he was alone with Barry.

***

Len stared at the smoking apartment building with disbelief. Was this some sort of joke? A curse? Maybe karma for all the shit he'd done when he was younger?

"Excuse me, sir," a young woman in a paramedic uniform said as she approached him. "Are you a resident here?"

Len shook his head. "No. My date lives here."

The woman gave him a sympathetic smile. "His name?"

"Barry Allen," Len answered. "Apartment 4C."

She checked the clipboard in her hands and smiled. "No one was badly hurt… let me see… okay, I found him. He's fine. He's been taken to CC Memorial for smoke inhalation, but he's fine."

Len swallowed a sigh of relief. "What happened?"

"Apparently someone on the second floor had a kitchen fire," she answered. "It spread fairly quickly, but the fire station is nearby and they responded within minutes. Everyone got out quickly. Anyway, for safety sake, it would be best if you stayed back behind the yellow tape."

Len nodded and turned to walk away. He made his way back to his motorcycle and sat down. Did he take this as a sign that he and Barry were doomed or did he head to the hospital and check up on the younger man?

The memory of those soft lips on his made up his mind for him. Hospital it was.

***

A smile and a wink got him directions to the room in the ER where Barry was under observation. He was almost there when he heard Barry's voice.

"Of course I'm fine," he grumbled, his voice a bit rough, probably from the smoke. "I really need to get back to the apartment."

"Barry, the building was on fire," a man's voice said. "It's going to take a few days to air out and see what kind of damage there is."

Barry groaned loudly. "You don't understand! I was expecting someone! It's already almost 7! He's going to think I stood him up, Eddie!"

"Your apartment building is on fire," the guy (Eddie?) stressed with exasperation. "I'm sure he'll understand."

Len heard the hospital bed squeak. "Edward Nathaniel Thawne," Barry hissed angrily, "I swear on everything I hold dear that if you do not go back to the apartment and find Len, explain what happened and get his phone number, I will make it my mission in life to thwart every goal you have. Every time you and Iris go out, I'll be a third wheel. On your wedding night, I'll call in a bomb threat to the hotel. I'll teach your children to cuss in sign language. Every holiday I'll buy you a parakeet! That includes birthdays, anniversaries and even Guy Fawkes Day! I'll… I'll… I'll stand beside your desk and sing Sweet Transvestite every day at work! Loudly!"

Len had to shove the heel of his hand into his mouth to keep from laughing out loud.

"Okay! Okay! Okay!" the other guy said frantically. "Find Len. Get number. Um, what does he look like?"

"My height, gorgeous blue eyes, distinguished salt and pepper hair, shoulders this broad, an ass you just wanna bite, hands perfect for wrapping around my…"

"OKAYOKAYOKAY!" the guy yelled. "I'll find him! Just... just stay here, okay?" Len quickly stepped behind a curtain as Eddie hurried out of the room and down the hall. "And I thought Iris could be scary," he mumbled as he passed by Len.

As soon as he was out of sight Len slid around the wall and into Barry's room. He studied the younger man for injuries. Barry's head was back and an arm was thrown over his eyes. There was a smudge of soot on his jaw and forehead. His left hand was wrapped in gauze. Despite the ugly mint green gown, he looked utterly adorable.

"So, what were you saying my hand is perfect for?" he purred.

Barry sat up and gave a gasp that quickly turned into a rough cough. Len moved to the bedside and grabbed the cup of water. He held it to Barry's lips and rubbed his back soothingly. "Sorry," he said gently.

Barry sipped the water and took a few shallow breaths. Once he felt better he quickly turned and slammed his lips against Len's. Len didn't even notice he dropped the cup as he wrapped his arms around Barry and kissed him back.

He barely noticed when Barry swung his legs off the bed and wrapped them around Len's waist, drawing him in closer. Len moaned as he felt Barry's erection prodding against his hip. "God, Scarlet," he growled, pulling back a few inches. "How are you even real?"

Breathing heavily, Barry grinned. "Me? I keep wondering how a scrawny nerd like me warrants the attention of a sexy hunk like you."

Len grinned wolfishly. "Maybe I've got a kink for lean cuties who threaten their friends with Sweet Transvestite."

Barry turned bright red and rubbed the back of his neck. "You, uh, heard all that, huh?"

Len chuckled and stroked Barry's back lightly. "Nice to know I'm not the only one eager."

Barry shifted his legs, drawing Len a little bit closer. "Eager doesn't even begin to cover it."

Before Len could respond the curtain was drawn back and the young black woman from the bank ran in, only to skid to a stop. An older black man was right behind her.

"Barry! Are you... oh. Um. Wow. Um…" she stammered.

The man behind her put a hand to his hip where a police issue gun rested in a holster. "What the hell… Leonard Snart?!"

Len tensed, recognizing the man now. "Detective West," he drawled. He shifted, putting as much of his body in front of Barry as he could with the bed rails in the way, protecting him.

"You know each other?" Barry asked, looking over Len's shoulder curiously.

West sneered. "He's a thief."

"Former," Len corrected with a smirk.

Barry looked at him curiously. "You were a thief?"

Len tensed and turned to look at Barry. "I was," he admitted. "I haven't pulled a heist in five years. Not since the Kahndaq Dynasty diamond job."

West snorted in disbelief but Barry looked more curious than alarmed. "Wait, you're Captain Cold?"

Len gave a single nod and steeled himself for Barry to send him away. He was surprised when Barry grinned.

"I remember reading about your jobs. The Rathaway painting Fire and Ice, in particular. I studied art heists in Central when I was doing my thesis in college." At Len's confused look Barry shrugged. "I'm a CSI."

Len bit back a groan. Of course he would be attracted to a cop. That was just his luck! He might not be a thief anymore, but most of his associates were. And he profited from that. He sold plans, perfect plans, to other thieves.

"I've had a clean record ever since I was paroled three years ago," Len told him.

"You spent thirty years as a criminal," West growled. "You expect me to believe you just turned over a new leaf that easily?"

"You were a criminal when you were a baby?" Barry gawked.

Len smirked. "How old do you think I am, Scarlet?"

"Um, 32 or maybe 33?"

"You're very good for my ego," Len purred. "I'm forty-three."

Barry's jaw dropped as he glanced down Len's body. "I hope my ass looks that good in twenty years," he mumbled.

"Barry!" Iris choked, sounding torn between shock and anger.

Barry blushed a deep red, realizing he had said that out loud. Len grinned even wider. West looked like he had been sucking on a lemon. Before anyone could say anything else the curtain moved again and a nurse walked in.

"Mister Allen? The doctor has cleared you to leave," she said, oblivious to the tension in the room.

Barry immediately hopped off the bed and reached for the clothes on the chair, inadvertently flashing the room. Len shifted to block everyone's view, unable to resist a quick pinch to Barry's left buttock. Barry yelped and jumped, then quickly pulled on his pants.

West clenched his hands before looking at Barry. "You can stay with me until your apartment is livable again, son."

"Son?" Len repeated.

"Foster son," Barry explained. "Joe took me in when my mom died and my dad went to prison." He turned to Joe and Iris as he pulled on his shirt. "Thanks Joe, but I can't impose. Besides, you turned my old room into a storage room, remember?"

"Impose? You know better than that," Joe said. "You can stay in Iris' old room, since she spends most night at Eddie's."

"You could stay with me," Len said suddenly. Everyone looked at him with varying degrees of surprise. Len shrugged calmly, hiding his own surprise at his impetuous offer. "I have a spare room."

"He's not staying with you!" West growled.

"Um, actually, I already have somewhere to stay," Barry said, a gleam of stubbornness shining in his eyes.

Joe and Iris both looked at Barry with surprise. "What? Where?" demanded Joe.

Barry hesitated a moment before squaring his shoulders and meeting Joe's eyes. "Ollie's condo. He gave me a key and said I could use it whenever I wanted. After the doctor checked my lungs I called and asked if the offer was still good. He said I was more than welcome to stay until my apartment is ready again."

Joe's eyes narrowed fiercely. "OLLIE?!" His mouth opened and closed several times before he growled and threw his hands up in the air. "You know what? I'm done. Date a thief. Live with a killer. Call me when you've got your head screwed on right!" Joe spun on his heels and stormed out of the room.

Iris gleefully turned to Len. "Barry is Oliver Queen's booty call."

"I am not!" Barry objected. "We're just friends!"

"He took you to Paris," Iris said.

"For Thea's wedding!" Barry pointed out.

"He flew you out to Starling every weekend for two months in his private jet."

"I was helping Laurel on a case!"

"He bought you a car."

"That's not mine! I don't even have a license!"

"It's in your parking space at the apartment."

"He left it here so he doesn't have to rent one when he's in town. It's not like I use the space."

"He flew in just to scare off that Jay guy."

"Garrick was a creep. Ollie was here for Dr. Wells' lecture!"

"A lecture he took you to."

"It was Harrison Wells!" Barry exclaimed. "The man's a genius! I'd have been Hannibal Lecter's plus one if it got me into that lecture!"

Iris looked at Len and smirked. Barry glared at her fiercely as he reached back and grabbed Len's hand. "Oh no, you don't!" Barry growled, pointing his finger at Iris. "You leave Len alone!"

Iris immediately put on an innocent expression. "I don't know what you mean, Barr."

"HA!" Barry snorted. "None of your tricks, Iris! I know you! This is about Eobard! Not! Happening!"

Iris crossed her arms over her chest and pouted. Barry tugged Len behind him as he walked quickly out of the room and headed down the hallway toward the nurse station. Len waited quietly as Barry signed a few forms and then pulled him outside. He began heading to the line of taxis but Len stopped him and motioned to the parking garage. "I'll give you a lift," he said.

Barry nodded, suddenly looking a bit shy. "Um, sorry about all that," he mumbled.

Len hesitated for a moment. "Explanations can wait until we get you to the condo."

Barry nodded and sighed. Soon he was perched behind Len on the motorcycle and they were weaving their way through traffic. When they reached the condo Barry asked him if he would come up. Len briefly considered cutting his loses, but then Barry pressed a chaste kiss to his lips. "Please?"

Len nodded and followed Barry to the elevators. They were quiet on the ride up. Once inside, Len glanced around, reluctantly impressed with the tasteful décor. It wasn't flashy or opulent, but inviting, despite the obvious wealth displayed. If he was still a thief, he'd be casing the place right now.

"Okay," Barry said breathing deeply. "So, first, Ollie is just a friend. We met in college. He's absolutely straight. We became friends when I accidentally saved his life."

"Accidentally?" Len repeated.

Barry huffed. "He was being held at gunpoint. I was late for class and cutting through the alley between buildings. I tripped and fell onto the kidnapper."

Len stared at Barry with an open mouth. "You… tripped… onto a kidnapper?"

Barry blushed. "Um, yeah. Anyway, Ollie tracked me down later and asked what he owed me. I explained it was an accident and he looked at me... kinda like you are now. Then a week later I was in the library, working on a paper when I heard a scuffle. I went to see what was going on and saw Ollie and another guy fighting. I leaned around a shelf to get a better look and...um, well… Iknockedtheshelfoverontotheguy."

Len felt the irrational urge to laugh. Or cry. Maybe both. He was beginning to think his bad luck wasn't actually his bad luck.

"So, after that Ollie began coming around to talk or hang out and before long we were friends," Barry continued. "He's kind of like a big brother. Joe and Iris hate him because they think he's a playboy and possibly a murderer."

"Possibly a murderer?" Len mumbled faintly.

"The third guy who tried to attack Ollie ended up with a snapped neck when he tripped over my book bag and fell down four flights of stairs," Barry said calmly. "Totally not Ollie's fault. Ollie may have shoved the guy off me, but it was my bag. Besides, the police ruled it self-defense."

Len slowly sank down onto the couch. Good lord! What was he getting himself into? He cleared his throat and licked his dry lips. "So, what's an eobard?"

Barry grumbled under his breath. "Eobard Thawne. Iris's boyfriend's brother. Iris thinks he is perfect for me and has been trying to get us together for two years. The guy's a real jerk. He's rich and thinks he can buy me. He's constantly trying to give me gifts and asking me out. He even sort of stalked me until Ollie threatened him. Iris has completely fallen for his charm, plus she has this fantasy about us marrying the brothers so we'll all be one big happy family. He gives me the willies."

Len ran a hand down his face. "This is unreal," he muttered.

Barry bit his bottom lip and moved to sit on the coffee table in front of Len. "Len..." he paused and took a deep breath. "I know all this sounds like some sort of stupid Spanish soap opera. I sometimes have a hard time wrapping my head around my life, too. But here's the important thing to remember. I like you. From the moment you sat down at my table in the bar, I've been drawn to you. Not just because you're hot as hell, either."

Len stared at Barry hopefully. "Oh?"

Barry nodded. "I like you, Len. You're smart and funny. I've never, in my life, gone home with someone so fast. I never do that. But there's something inside me that says this could be a good thing. That you could be very important to me. When I kiss you, it's exciting, but there's also this feeling in my gut that says you could be the one for me. I'm not trying to pressure you, I swear, but I've never had that with anyone. I've never felt so... so safe. It's as if I've finally found where I belong when I think of you."

"We've only known one another a week," Len pointed out. "Barely that. A few kisses and aborted make-outs. An hour's conversation. Not even a real date."

Barry visibly deflated. "Yeah," he mumbled. "I… I get it."

Barry started to stand, but Len quickly grabbed his wrists. The moment the words were out of his mouth, he had regretted them, because Barry was right. He had felt that same spark, that same faint promise of something good and happy with Barry.

He had never been good at opening up to people. He learned to hide his emotions early in life, lessons taught to him with fists and a belt. And yet, here was a guy, half his age, telling him that he could have something he never dared to wish for. "You're going to be the death of me, kid," he whispered before leaning in and kissing Barry gently.

When he pulled back, Barry's eyes were shining with hope. "Does that mean we're okay?"

Len grinned and stood, pulling Barry to his feet. He closed the distance between them and kissed Barry again, with more passion. "Oh, yeah," he whispered against Barry's lips. "We're okay."

Barry relaxed, his arms winding around Len's neck. "So," he began shyly. "Would you, um, like to stay? Tonight?"

Len grinned like a cat that swallowed a canary. "Just try and kick me out," he growled, reaching down to groped Barry's ass.

***

Over the next six months Len often found himself torn between exasperation and amusement. Barry attracted trouble like a bear to honey. Inordinately clumsy, Lisa referred to him as a walking disaster. If there was a single crack in a mile of sidewalk, Barry would trip over it. If there was a lone mugger in the entire city, Barry would run into him. (And then engage the mugger in a conversation about life choices.)

Mick called him a calamity. Three out of five times when they went to a bar, it ended in a fight. Especially if someone hit on Len. It turns out, Barry was surprisingly possessive. Violently so, if the person didn't back off quickly enough. For all his usual clumsiness, Barry could throw a punch rather well. Mick found it hilarious that a skinny twenty-four year old twink was capable of knocking out a man twice his size with just one well placed punch.

A human hazard. Those were Oliver's words. (Usually said with a fond shake of his head.)

Len still found his friendship with the billionaire from Starling a bit strange. The morning after (FINALLY!) sleeping with Barry, he woke up to find an honest-to-god arrow pointed at his face. Oliver, an archery fanatic, had been standing over the bed. He silently motioned with his chin for Len to slip out of the bed and move into the living room. He spent the next ten minutes being interrogated by Oliver, his girlfriend Felicity and his bodyguard Diggle.

Then Barry woke up, walked out of the bedroom yawning and froze as he took in the scene. For one second Len had wondered if this would be that one thing too much, the straw that broke the camel's back for Barry. Instead, Barry had rolled his eyes, walked over to Len and kissed him deeply before turning to their company.

"Leave Len alone, Ollie, or else I'll let him kick your ass before we go out for breakfast. I'm going to get cleaned up. And you're buying, since my wallet is still at my place and you're filthy rich."

Then he went into the bathroom. A few seconds later they heard the shower start. Oliver began to laugh and clapped Len on the shoulder. "Welcome to the family," he said with a chuckle.

Before he knew it, the billionaire was a frequently used contact in his phone, and whenever he went to Starling for business (we're never talking about your job, because I don't want to get fired, Barry often said) he stayed in the Queen family home. Oliver's mom even called him 'son', just like she did Barry.

Even Joe had come around after a few months. They would never be buddies, but at least Joe no longer fingered his gun when they were in the same room. Iris still made snide remarks, mostly about the age difference or Len's shady past, but Barry and Len easily ignored her. One visit from Mick, Mark and Len had convinced Eobard that Barry was off-limits.

Len looked down at the small velvet box in his hand. Six months and his life was completely turned upside down. He slid the box into his jacket pocket and took one last look in the mirror to make sure he looked perfect. He was 98% positive Barry would say yes. He was 100% positive Barry was the best thing that ever happened to him.


End file.
